The Record Player

my mother my

father him her

maybe them too

my brother my

sister and still

on and on this

list goes in no

particular

order and I

stare at the sky

thinking wow the

act of living

is to possess

the courage to

lift the needle

look I want to

stay still to stay

the same just to

stay but for this

world of static

sanding me down

like a broken

record catching

catching at a

pity party

for one but still

spinning spinning

like jewel box

ballerinas

yet unlike them

I could still step

forward step by

step flat on my

feet living for

those who erase

the scratches of

my vinyl mind

so every night

I list them count

them repeating

their names in my

head one by one:

Meghane Saidenberg